i really cannot be with other 'species'

species??? my friends... ='(
they are chinese educated.. and i am different..i am english educated..
what they talked, i understand...
i really cannot stand the feelings...
why can't they stop saying looking down at me, thinking i very stupid???
if you think you are smart, then be yourself..
no need to force OR ask other people to follow you what you want..
is their wills... you no need to ask them to do what...

you all know or not???
i have been following what you all said until now..
you all talked to me is like really fed up of me..
what do you all want???
i have been patient..
patient since we start our assignments...
what do you all want from me???
what i do, just let me do..
i will learn from mistakes...
i really cannot stand the way you all treat me..
only two of you all soft to me..
the other both of you, please lar...
respect me... i did wrong, you all shouldn't let go your angers...
the way you all talk like want to fight and argue...
just an assignment...
because of assignments, you want us to be enemy is it???
 why can't you be soft too like the other two of them???
i don't want to say out the names...
because this is public...
you see, i still give you chance...
if other people, they will post your name already...
please lar... humans sure will make mistakes...
why can't you both understand me..???
i know i am not enough intelligent like you...
but if can, as your good friend, you should guide me...

do you know???
all the tips in our coursework test,
i wanted to be selfish and don't want to share with our classmates..
but i refused myself to do that...
i like my classmates..
how they treat me also, i still like them...
i share everything i got...
why can't you all be same as me???
don't be selfish, don't show faces, eg, anger, hatred...
please... and please...
if not next semester i change class or the following semester..
i will tell admin that you all never treat me good..
if group team, we cannot communicate properly..
please.. respect me...
i respect you all...
and also...
if any tips for future, i won't give anyone anymore if you all treat me rudely and badly..
i might feel hatred to you all...
i am serious... and i will not forget on what you all did to me..
i am the type of person who never forget things...
usually bad things... good things i will keep in heart...
bad things, i will keep them as memories...
maybe i can learn from my mistakes...
but for this..please... i don't want to hate you all...
i have known you all for more than 1 year already.. now is semester 4...(year 2 semester 1)
you all angry of me because of the assignment???
do you all got feeling or not???
moreover, sometimes you all talk to loud to me...
i am scare you know..i don't like people talk loud to me..

and i have many friends... those coursework tips...
i know..some of you all got..but don't want to share..
it's ok..i will share... because i am a sharing type of person..
likes to share things with other people..
if you all treat me badly and rudely...
i will change class and won't give you all tips anymore..
i only give to those who are nice to me...
i am serious..
my heart cannot stand hurt anymore...
because of my ex.. he had hurt me badly...
and now because of you all... you all hurt me....
don't you feel that???

i don't know what you all think about me...
but i hope we can communicate well until diploma ( semester 7)
i want to leave this college very soon too...
but i have to complete my diploma...
i want to go to other branch ..maybe in Penang..
but i have to work... i cannot depend on my parents...

so please... i really cannot stand...
that's why i am writing these now...
just to release my feelings..
i have no hatred to you all..
but please... if you all continuously keep hurting me..
i will change class and won't give tips to those who hurt me anymore..
why???
because i have hatred already...
please don't make me like this ok...
i am a good person..
it is just how you treat me...