lifeless & sadness

i just don't understand why nowadays people want to be alone..

like example,

they want to do their own things...

example for boy,

if a boy, he don't want his girlfriend to disturb, or his friends...

or whoever lar...

he just don't want them to disturb him..

what he want to do, he just do..

ya... of cause what he want can do...

but he got think of his parents and girlfriend's feelings???

he less spend time with them...

i want to ask...

cousin or girlfriend more important???

friends or girlfriend more important???

i know! parents are more important than girlfriend...

so it is okie if he go out with parents..

but he less spend time with girlfriend,

spend more time with parents,

sure his girlfriend don't really mind right???

i know some mind...

for me, i mind... if he too much spend time with parents..

and never even sms or call his girlfriend,

sure his girlfriend angry mar...

and also,

if he keep saying busy busy,

also must explain what he doing mar...

how can never explain..

just say busy like that...

his girlfriend knows he doing what meh??? right???

he should tell her...let her know!

i know his girlfriend also tell him what she did...

then... even worst..

his girlfriend feel sad..

he did not even bother to reply one sms...

how can like that!!

then go out with cousin nevermind lor huh...

the thing is why he never reply even one sms...

if he cannot call mar maybe his girlfriend thinks that 'Oh,maybe he is at outside, hard to call' (hand need hold mar)

but... sms???

just short sms cannot meh???

just take around 2 minutes only mar..

his girlfriend feel sad eh..

how can he just ignore like that leh..

somemore he can go out with cousin so happily..

do not even bother about his girlfriend..

how can eh!

he treats his girlfriend as what eh~~

and so many days his girlfriend waiting for his call...

she told him already, weekend call or sms her..

never even bother..

then his girlfriend taught that he is busy helping or working..

because he everytime tell her this mar...

then suddenly she found out eh,

he go out with cousins, what lar...

sure jealous and angry lor..

if not jealous also, will angry wan mar right???

if for you, how you feel???

you see now..

his cousin~~ never appreciate what he give her eh~~

she said the phone was no good eh...

what lar...

how you do this to him eh!

he treat you so good...

just use the phone and appreciate lar..

if not give him back go buy new phone lor...

i just don't know why nowadays children,

never appreciate...

seriously never appreciate...

i tell you har..

one day, i just say 'if'~~ 'IF'

you have girlfriend har...

she is not like me, then you know!

everything you need to do by your own...

she won't help you..

you think now girls will do anything for their boys meh???

NO! Majority NO! No offense..

WHY??? because boys will treat girls bad IF

the girls everytime want to find, talk, spend time, and also care too much for the boys...

what the hell lar... why boys never appreciate a girl???

Just that she has a bad temper, you just leave her alone???

Oh, wrong man... She can change one day..

And..

Just because she cannot dress up properly,you just leave her alone???

Oh, wrong man.. She can change one day too...

And also,

Just because you see other girls are more better, nicer outfit (looks) than her, you just want to be with other girl???

And also,

Just because you think she is not smart enough, haven't success yet, you leave her alone???

You know or not...

YOU HURT HER SO MUCH!!

JUST BECAUSE OF HER BAD TEMPER...

YOU TOTALLY IGNORE HER...!

HOW CAN YOU DO THIS TO HER!!

AND YOU KNOW HER FAMILY ALREADY!!

WHAT DO HER FAMILY THOUGHT ABOUT YOU IF YOU LEAVE HER ALONE???

YOU NEVER EVEN EXPLAIN TO HER WHAT YOU WANT TO DO~~

YOU TOLD HER BEFORE, YOU WANT TO STUDY FIRST...

AND FORGET THIS, PUT ASIDE~~

OKIE...I CAN ACCEPT..WHAT YOU SAID IS CORRECT...

BUT IN THE END, LIKE NOW,

YOU CANNOT JUST IGNORE AND LEAVE HER ALONE..

YOU NEVER THOUGHT OF WHAT HER FAMILY THINK ABOUT YOU???

YOU NEVER THOUGHT OF WHAT SHE THINKS ABOUT YOU???

YOU NEVER THOUGHT OF WHAT HER FRIENDS THINK ABOUT YOU???

SHE CAN CHANGE! AND WILL CHANGE!

BECAUSE SHE IS STILL YOUNG AND STILL STUDY!

THAT'S WHY SHE WEARS NORMAL, NOT LIKE OTHER GIRLS, WEAR SHORTS AND STRIPS T-SHIRT AND HIGH HEELS..

BECAUSE OF YOU, I AM GOING TO CHANGE NOW~~

I JUST DON'T KNOW WHY YOU DO THIS TO ME...

WHY WHY WHY???!

YOU MADE ME SUFFER!

LAST TIME YOUR EX ALSO DO TO YOU LIKE THIS,

YOU ALSO SUFFER RIGHT??? =’(

YOU SHOULD KNOW HOW I WILL FEEL…=’(

AND WE ALREADY PROMISE…

WHAT WE DO, WHAT ARGUMENT OR SCOLDING EACH OTHER OR ANY MISUNDERSTANDS, OR SAYING STUPID WORDS,

WE WILL CALL AND TALK PROPERLY…

YOU REMEMBER OR NOT???

WE WILL DISCUSS AND PATCH BACK NICELY..

SO NO MISUNDERSTAND..

YOU SHOULD KNOW MY HEART FOR YOU IS VERY IMPORTANT ALSO...

I ALREADY TOLD YOU SO MANY TIMES,

IS A YES OR NO!!

YOU SAID YES!

BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO GET HURT AGAIN!

YOU SAID YES!

I REMEMBERED!

I TOLD YOU, I DON'T WANT TO GET HURT AGAIN!

THEN YOU PROMISE ME WON'T HURT ME ANYMORE!

I TELL YOU MY PAST LIFE STORY...

HOW HURT AM I...

I KNOW... FOR MY EX.. IS MY ATTITUDE...MY BAD TEMPER...

BUT HE SERIOUSLY HURT ME BADLY..

WHAT YOU TREAT I AM MY ATTITUDE YOU KNOW THAT???

AND I GOT TOLD YOU BEFORE, I LIKE THIS BOY FOR SO LONG,

IN THE END, HE TOLD ME, I'M NOT SUITABLE BECAUSE OF MY AGE GAP

AND I'M TOO YOUNG FOR HIM...

THEN I'M SO DEPRESS...

HOW I WANT TO FACE RELATIONSHIP IN FUTURE LEH???

YOU SAY LEH??? I SCARE YOU KNOW THAT TIME...

THAT'S WHY I NEVER GET INTO A RELATIONSHIP FOR SO LONG! MORE THAN 3 YEARS!

YOU GET IT OR NOT???

YOU GET IT OR NOT???!!

I CAN CHANGE MY BAD TEMPER WAN..

JUST GIVE ME TIME..TIME WILL CHANGE US EVERYTHING...

BE PATIENT...!!

HOW YOU TREAT ME ALSO SAME WHAT...

YOUR TEMPER IS QUITE BAD..

SOMETIMES YOU NAG AT ME, SOMETIMES SCOLD ME FOR NO REASON,

SOMETIMES SAY STUPID THINGS LIKE I SAID THAT DAY..=.=

BUT I CAN TAKE IT...!

WHY???

BECAUSE I CARE FOR YOUR FEELINGS...

I GOT ONCE TOLD MYSELF TO BREAK UP TOTALLY...

BUT I TELL MYSELF..

CANNOT!

SERIOUSLY CANNOT!!

WHY???

BECAUSE I CARE FOR YOUR FEELINGS..

AND I ALREADY LOVE YOU SO DEEP...

HOW CAN I JUST DO THAT RIGHT???

I DON'T WANT TO MAKE WRONG MOVE ANYMORE...

WHY ARE YOU SO MEAN TO ME???

IF YOU ANGRY AND DON'T WANT TO CALL ME,

JUST LET IT FOR FEW DAYS LAR...

WHY WANT TO MAKE IT WEEKS???  MONTHS???  OR MAYBE YEARS???

IT'S TORTURING YOU KNOW!

I HAVE TOLD YOU..

I DON'T WANT TO GET HURT AGAIN..

AND YOU JUST DID IT AGAIN..! LIKE OTHER BOYS!!

WHY??? WHY YOU TREAT ME LIKE THIS??? =’(

JUST BECAUSE OF MY BAD TEMPER, YOU LEAVE ME ALONE LIKE THIS...

I KNOW...I ADMIT I SORRY ABOUT THAT DAY I'M TOO MUCH...

I KEEP CALLING AND SCOLDED YOU SO RUDE..

I ALREADY APOLOGIZE, AND EVEN SENT YOU YOUR FAVOURITE TOY..

YOU STILL NOT HAPPY MEH???

YOU ARE STILL ANGRY WITH ME MEH???

WHAT EXACTLY YOU WANT???

YOU KNOW OR NOT..

SINCE I KNOW YOU, FOR LIKE HALF A YEAR,

YOU CHANGED SO MUCH!

YOU ONLY CARE ABOUT CAREER..

AND YOU LIKE ONLY CARE YOUR SIDE THERE...

MEANING IF YOUR FAMILY, COUSIN, ANYONE LAR, WANT TO GO OUT WITH YOU,

YOU JUST DO WHAT YOU LIKE...

THIS I DON'T MIND...BUT WHY YOU LIKE LESS SPEND TIME WITH ME..

THIS I I...REALLY DON'T LIKE...SUDDENLY YOU BECOME LIKE THIS..

SURE I FEEL DIFFERENT AND ABIT ANGRY LOR...

I THOUGHT YOU REALLY WANT TO HELP KAYMA...

LIKE LAST TIME ABOUT THAT THING..

YOU REMEMBER RIGHT??

OR EITHER YOU NEED HELP YOUR FAMILY ABOUT THAT THING...

I'M SURE YOU REMEMBER..

I REMEMBER...

I THOUGHT SOMETHING LIKE THIS MAR..

SO I SUDDENLY SAW YOU IN FB, SAW YOUR PICTURE GO OUT WITH COUSIN,

SURE I GOT ABIT FEEL YOU LIED ME LOR...

SURE I ANGRY LOR..

SO THAT DAY I TEST TO CALL YOU..

YOU SUDDENLY SAY 'I'M BUSY'..

THEN YOU NEVER TELL ME WHAT YOU DO ON THAT TIME..

SO EARLY MORNING, HOW CAN YOU BUSY..SOMEMORE THAT DAY IS YOUR FIRST DAY SCHOOL...WHERE YOU BEEN EH???

WHY NEVER TELL ME...

SOMEMORE ON SATURDAY AND SUNDAY,

ONE OF THE DAY ALSO NEVER CALL ME…

OR EVEN SMS,

OR EVEN REPLY ME…

I FEEL HURT...SERIOUSLY HURT...

I ALREADY TELL YOU LAST TIME BEFORE START RELATIONSHIP...

IS EITHER YES OR NO!

YOU SAID YES ALREADY..!!

NOW I DON'T KNOW WHAT I SHOULD DO....

I DON'T KNOW HOW IS YOUR FEELING ALSO..

I'M SERIOUSLY PRESSURE...

MY MIND STUCK!

YOU CANNOT KEEP IN YOUR HEART EVERYTHING..

YOU SHOULD SAY EVERYTHING TO ME...

LET ME KNOW!

THEN I KNOW WHAT TO DO...

YOU SEE NOW...

I KNOW YOU SURE KEEP SOMETHING IN YOUR HEART..

YOU DON'T WANT TO SAY UNTIL NOW YOU REALLY CANNOT STAND,

THEN YOU LET GO EVERYTHING...RIGHT???

AND YOU GET ME INTO THE WORST CONDITION...

WHY??? ~~

I WONDER..

WHY WHY WHY??? ='(

I THOUGHT YOU WON'T HURT ME ANYMORE LIKE OTHER BOYS...

I JUST CANNOT ACCEPT THESE…

WHY HAPPEN TO ME AGAIN~~

='(