1.28am

my mind is thinking...
why people change...
that's reality....
i believed that....
and i was wrong because i was not enough mature...
even now, i don't think i am mature enough to think for the future...
i just realized something...my feelings for you is still very deep....
i didn't show my feelings.. during in computer lab in my college...
it's 11.48am, and i wanted to blog, but i got to go..
so now only i got the chance to release my feelings....
well,i still have strong feelings for you...
do you know.... when i go to your profile....
it's like i think 2 months plus i never go to your profile..
because i know my heart will cannot stand the pain...so i control myself...
i type the name... ' ronald liang' and i saw his profile..
i was shock... that he changed a lot....it's ok he changed a lot...
but i don't want him to be a bad person...
yes, i admit... that's his name.. the boy i truly love... NOT like.... for almost 2 years...
why i love him... it's because i feel that he care for me... maybe he gave what i want...
i just cannot accept the fact that why he must leave me alone like this...
as though as i am staying in the dark place...
i know i have my family.... my 2 brothers also don't really bother me....
my mother from morning to evening work.. =( then at night she is tired and need to sleep..
then my father need to do housework... then at night, he usually sleeps early...
me leh.. i don't know what to do... =(
one of my best friend, she told me that i am not yet mature...
it's true... i couldn't forget him...
my heart is stubborn... i still want to find him...
but how??? i am not in penang now... i am in KL now.... =(
last time one of my friend, she told me she will help me.. by trying to talk to him..
but what??? she never help me... actually there are 2 girls.... i asked them for help....
asking one of them to be friend and try to talk to him. another one is his best friend...
i really don't understand... why they must ignore me.. =(
i really don't know why got these two fake friends...
want to know their names???
one is Sherilyn Lee... i asked her to be friend with him and try to talk to him.. but she always says wait, she is busy... i just saw his profile.. she liked his photo and it's like following him.... wth.. is she supporting him???
and another one... Sin Kah... i really don't understand this girl...she knows that i really love him.. she told me that she can't pursue him...wth leh...they are best friend... sure will listen to each other.. somemore hang out together always... i just wondering... are you jealous when we are together last time???
both of you are so damn selfish... i am your friend... we are girls.. should help each other....
seriously... some girls just support guys...FAKE friends you know....

now...i only depend on my mother, Lydia... she is a great person... i hope she won't be like that two girls.. hmm... act as want to help.. asking me what happen and all those thing.. but in the end never help.. i really hate this kind of people.. like busybody.. don't want to help, say... want to help then say..i don't care..

i don't know what to do...
i just need my mummy to help me out now.... =(
now the thing is that... she tag me some photo... i scare he sees
so tomorrow i am going to tell her....

and i hope this blog is not so public..but i don't care... you want to hate me then hate me.....
you are fake friends... i hate fake friends...
in this world.. they are people who like you....and people who dislike you..
so yea... accept it...

and good nights...